two roads

i totally forgot that i had already made this blog until today. thinking about it, i remember one night that i really wanted to start writing again (i had one a long time ago, but dropped it because i thought i should...not really sure why now though). after checking out my some of friends blogs recently, i decided that i would start things up for real.

geez, where to start...for one, i hope that no one takes what i write out of context...i imagine that only people i know will read this, if any. then again, i think that is what most people hope for when they write on these things. i'm sure there are exceptions, but for the most part i think that blogging is just a way to emote things in another media.

i keep thinking that i have to update or write in a consistent manner, but i have to keep reminding myself that it's my blog and that mean i can do it whenever i want. the whole independence thing (life, job, graduation, etc.) is still new to me because i'm so used to following some sort of guidelines. now the only thing i have that really does keep my in check is a job, but even then, after 5:00 it's back to my life and no structure.

i've tried getting down some good habits, like being involved at church, eating right and going to the gym...i think that i'm doing a good job at that sort of stuff, but there's no one to tell me or give me a "grade," if you will, so i have nothing really to say if it's "A" student material, or "C" student material (like i'm more use to). it's weird being out and trying to figure it all out for yourself, especially if half of your heart is still in the midwest.

i'm trying to transition still and i do love it out here on the east coast...i guess it's just something that comes along with time...like the longer i spend out here, the more acclimated i will become to the area and what not. and then i think, i don't want to get acclimated, that sounds like i'm forcing myself to conform to an area that i might not fit into exactly, and that's no good. i don't know, it's just some of the things i think about sometimes and it makes me wonder where i'm supposed to be right now.

there is a lot going for me now though, but i always feel like there could be more...who knows, only time will tell i suppose.

ciao for now,
-rhino